“Watch in horrow as pathetic, sentimental and utterly defenceless bags of fluff are shot, burned, beheaded, electrocuted, drowned, roasted, torn apart by machines and more. Ready Teddy Death is the greatest bear massacre ever committed to film. There's no plot, no dialogue, no computer graphics and no subtitles. Just endless cheesy music as whole boxes of brand new bears get wasted. Shock and awe… and a river of cheap synthetic stuffing.”

And so reads the flyer advertising the release of Ready Teddy Death link on DVD and VHS. To honour the occasion, Glasswerk has teamed up with our friends at Gut Records link and link to offer you Glasswerk readers the chance to win one of two copies of the DVD or even one of the 'pathetic, sentimental, defenceless' bears described above. Sadly, and highly ironically, the Ready Teddy Death mug that was also intended to be a prize did not survive the journey across London and ended up having its handle ripped off by the brutality of the Royal Mail.

Anyway, I digress. In order to win one of the two DVDs or the bear itself, you should leave a comment on this article stating in the most descriptive detail possible, how you would kill a Ready Teddy Death bear. The three most gruesome and horrificly grotesque accounts of bear death will win the prizes. You will have to leave your email address in the appropriate field in order for Glasswerk to contact you.

Ready…. Teddy….

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