Yeti interview

Some of this interview is a piss take; do not believe everything they say!
It's clear to see how this band have fun…by lying in interviews. Well, it made us laugh, even if it is a bit confusing. Glasswerk presents Yeti, the future stars of their own cartoon comedy on Nickleodeon.

John Hassall – Vocals, Guitar
Harmony Williams – Vocals, Guitar Mark
Andrew Déian – Lead Guitar, Vocals
Brendan Kersey – Electric Bass
Graham Blacow – Drums

John – hi my names john and I live in Islington and I’m a young man and er yes and I have a responsibility as a guitar player and singer in yeti and I’m 21 years old not really I’m 26, 25/26
Andrew – I’m mark I’m from the middle England, they used to make star wars or some kind of bollocks there.
Mark – (in high pitch voice) Its not bollocks its really good
A – Gary Lineker’s from there and but I’m better looking
M – yeah you are
A – and I’m not gay. Just a bit camp
John – Brendan do you want to say something?
Graham – Yeah hi I’m Graham. I’ve never met these people. They kidnapped me and put me in their silver bus and dragged me to Liverpool. And I wanna go home.

Where does the name come from?

John – it came from, there was a steam ship in Burma called the yeti and we were all passengers on the yeti and this is in 1987
Brendan – Its gonna be one of them interviews is it?
J– yes 7 and we were carrying rubber goods
Andrew – I wasn’t there
J – Andrew wasn’t.
G – Andy was working on the ship
J – and he was working on the ship
A– it was my ship
J – And yeah we er there was a big collision with a big volcanic rock
M – a volcanic frog?
J – a volcanic frog just erupted from the water and ate us all and it told us in our dreams that we should call the band Yeti.

Are you enjoying the tour so far?

G – f****n love it. On date two now. It’s been a blast.

Do you have any interesting stories?

M – You’ve got a funny one
J – Tell her about the pizza
G – Oh I cant I can’t even finish that story
M – Carrot pizza! Carrot pizza!
G – Well you lived it Mark you should tell it
M – In Italy they don’t know what potatoes are, that’s pretty much the story. You can make the rest up for yourself, in the knowledge that the pizza came with carrots on it instead of potato
A – Why would you have a pizza with potatoes on it?
M – I don’t know. I don’t know why you would have it I just thought it would be like sautéed potatoes that had been fried a little then tossed on top of the pizza I didn’t think they’d put carrots on there. Anyway it said potatoes on the menu and came with carrots. Anyway that’s the most interesting story.
J – That’s the most interesting thing that has ever happened to us.

Who are the best and worst bands you’ve played with?

G – Worst band were Stealer. All they do is play a bass drum.
J – that’s not a bass drum
A – We played with Jet once. Yeah, they were rubbish.
J – You bit the hand that feeds you.
A – They’re shit.
J – They gave us a good gig.
A – Rubbish that was rubbish man. F****n hate Jet.
M – Who was the worst band that we’ve ever played with?
A – White Rose Movement, they where fucking annoying. They keyboard player was alright but otherwise it was rubbish.
M – Yeah put it in print: White Rose Movement suck.
G – We might get a headline out of this, that’s how you do it these days.

Who are your musical icons/influences?

A – Towers of London they’re shit, they are actually the worst band ever.
M – (reading the names of the posters on the walls) The Young Knives and the er The Beta Band, The Thrills, 22 20s and Hal are really good as well. (on being informed that 22 20s have actually split up now) Have they split up? I’m gutted they where like my favourite band. Who are they? 22s and the 20s. Oh the 11 10s

What bands do you like at the minute?

M -I like the beta band, the thrills, 22 20s
G – They split up
M – Split up! The 11 10s at the moment
J – Mark likes the ordinary boys
M – yeah they’re amazing, I love that bloke that leads them
J – Mark actually likes The Others
M – yeah we love The Others, we love that song.
M – Girls Aloud
G – Yeah well everyone loves Girls Aloud
J – they do really like Girls Aloud. They’re a bit passé now, they’ve been around for ages.

What was the first CD you bought?

J – see when we were growing up we were buying vinyl and tapes cassettes so my first, the first thing I ever got was teenage mutant ninja turtles spin off single and er it had a single called Splinters story, the big rat, he related the story of the turtles, and that was my first single. Went downhill from there really. What’s you first music you ever bought? (Directed at Andrew)
A – Erasure Ebenezer Good [The Shamen]
J – Yeah I mean like I suppose I didn’t really get into music till I was about 13 I’d just buy loads of Beatles albums and then related sort of bands really so that’s the best band for me, really captured my heart.

What’s the best thing about being in a band?

G – interviews!

What’s the worst thing about being in a band?

J – Worst thing I think sometimes waiting you know you have to wait around for things I mean that’s why if you like you see it for what it is, you make the most out of it then sometimes it gets wait for this wait for sound check wait for like wait for the gig wait for the interview its not bad.
M – Carrying stuff
G – That’s a bit of a bummer isn’t it? That’s why we’re eating sandwiches, your not allowed on until you’ve eaten sandwiches. Why do you think we’re all eating sandwiches?

What’s your favourite mode of transport?

J – I like trains yeah, I like riding a train, why?
M – Cos he likes Ringo Star and he used to narrate Thomas the Tank Engine
J – That’s it. Yes, thanks.
B – He bailed you out, you owe him one.

If you could play with any band who would it be?

M – Play with in what respect? Cheryl Tweedy, Girls Aloud. Onstage with them is that what the question is?
J – I'd like to play with Stealer.
M – I'd like to play, I think we’d all like to play with the 11 10s
J – You know what, I don’t really feel like the urge to play with anybody really.
A – Would you play with The Beatles?
J – But they’re dead two of them are dead, but if there was magic involved then The Beatles.
G – Hang on a minute is it not supporting them? Anyone as longs as they’re signed and I get paid. Bring it on.

If you could be anyone, dead or alive, who would you be?

J – I would be the John Yeti who could fulfill his potential as a human yeah I’d be myself but I’d be myself as a person who had fulfilled their potential. But I wouldn’t wanna be anyone else. What’s my potential? I suppose its my dreams and aspirations and like everything you ever dreamed for being able to make that reality. That’s my potential.
M – So you’d be you? Of all people?
J – Yeah as a matter of face I would. Why who would you be? Christopher Eccleston?
M – I’d be Jonny Knoxville, someone who jumps out of planes cos I wouldn’t do that, ever. I’d be like Bruce Lee. Kick peoples f****n heads in. I’d be Tom Cruise and I could know all the secrets of scientology. Or I’d be George Bush. I’d be Osama Bin Laden so I’d know if I was alive or dead or not.
G – He’s alive, he keeps sending us videos
M – It could be the government making them up
J – Who would you be Brendan?
B – I’d be Mark, I’m gonna wear his jeans tonight and not my ripped ones.
M– Macaulay Culkin cos he’s dating Mila Kunis, she’s the girl out of That Seventies Show.
G – Oh the little one?
M– Yeah the one with black hair. He’s quite tall now he’s taller then when he was in home alone.
G – Yeah that’s to be expected I suppose.
J – He got caught inhaling aerosols. Yeah, he banged Michael Jackson.
G – What? He banged Michael Jackson not Michael Jackson banged him?
M – I’d be Michael Jackson so I could bang Macaulay Culkin, he could go like this (pulls famous home alone face) as I’m doing him. (In comic Michael Jackson voice) 'Macaulay just do that bit in the film where you put the aftershave on keep it wide open that’s right'
J – F****n hell!
A – We wanna be Michael Jackson.
G – No, we wanna do the Jackson 5, don’t we.
A -The white Michael Jackson
G – We could all be a different Michael Jackson
G – I’ll be the young one
M – The five Michael’s
M – my niece said I look like him in the You Are Not Alone video
G – you can be him
M – I can be Michael Jackson in the 'you are not alone' video
G – Brendan can be Thriller
J – I could be the bad Jackson
M – Earth song?
A – Yeah but that’s too much tree hugging. I don’t like trees
J – Did he get booed off stage because he started doing World Song?
M – he didn’t get booed
J – and he just did half of it
A – I saw it and I read a newspaper on it and that’s rubbish that never actually happened. Someone else did it but he didn’t actually walk offstage
J – I thought he did half the song? He did the chorus and then stopped
A – he did the chorus to We are the World yeah
G – So yeah to reiterate we’d all like to be Michael Jackson
M – i'm gonna be Dennis Rodman during big brother
G – he took extra large condoms and no underwear. Taped it.

What is music? In your opinion

G – You’re asking the wrong band
M – I don’t think its an opinion I mean I think there’s a dictionary definition.
J – well it’s an interesting question isn’t it? What is music? You know its all relative isn’t it? Is it like some cave man?
G – you’re answering a question with a question there.
J – or is it Mozart or Bach?
M – It's Michael Jackson and Macaulay Culkin.

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