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You know what it’s like when a new movie trailer comes out – it gets passed around Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Youtube and before long there’s a comments list a mile long full of expletives and angry trolls engaged in a bitter flame war over just what the hell Jar Jar Binks is doing in yet another Star Wars franchise or denying the existence of the fourth Indiana Jones movie (it’s a trilogy guys, ok?). Things get out of hand and eventually someone tries to step in and calm things down, only to be engulfed in a sea of negative energy – imagine a world where this kind of behaviour spills onto the streets and we’re all in trouble; to coin a phrase, who ya’ gonna call?

The kind crew over at V-Energy have taken it upon themselves to sort the real critics from the mean-spirited with their new V-Hab program, designed to readjust the cinematically-frustrated and restore balance to the movie viewing community. The first stage of the recovery programme is a comment convertor that took six weeks to build using natural language processing. This thing could well contain the largest database of profanity known to mankind, giving Samuel L Jackson a run for his money, and is designed to transform any negative trolling into a stream of positivity.

They’ve also created a ‘De-troll Your Life’ browser extension which sweeps to the darkest recesses of the internet to help avoid a relapse, or you can call in a ‘Troll Intervention’ to silence the worst offenders via a Facebook app. Also, the V-Hab Shush Kitten is probably the cutest little guy we’ve seen since Homeward Bound ruined our childhoods forever, so stock up on some positive energy – let’s make IMDB a nicer place to browse and Silence the Troll.”


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Sponsored by V Energy Drink

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