Finding Emo

• 28th Jan 2008

It's been an interesting weekend.

Normally I might spend my drinking time, albeit unintentionally, around some of the more overtly masculine popsters being bred in the scene that happens to be closest to my house – aka The Lad.

The Lad is a mouthy, swaggering statement of intent to batter, pillage or shag anything and everything they might come into contact with – usually, but not always, in the name of irony (which is another way of saying they've actually been brought up better than that).

But irony aside, I'd like to make a sweeping observation that the Lad scene contains more emo per head of population than any other genre.

I don't know if it's the repressed sensitivity, the forced 'good time' nature of the traditional drink and drug binge, or the isolation that comes from being so much bigger/better/harder than everyone else, but there are enough time bombs of issues in a room full of Lads to launch a thousand Linkin Parks.

This particular observation comes from a weekend spent with a couple of bands that my usual company would readily and enthusiastically deride as 'emo' – meaning, merely, that their material would suggest that the world is about to end, and they wear a combination of black, eyeliner, leather and fingerless gloves.

However, I put it to you that emo is not a noise or a fashion statement, emo is a state of mind, and it just so happens that once the music is out of the way, Emo bands and fans make much better drinking buddies than Lad bands and fans.

Having spent some of Saturday night in a bar I won't name, but which attracts rabid fans of lad bands past and present (usually past), it'll be a while before I go there again. Not because of the music, but because of the atmosphere. As one of the staff told me, the clientele prefer to drop their glasses on the floor when they've finished with them rather than take them back to the bar, and fights break out on a regular basis as someone feels the need to prove something to someone else, usually something that requires a physical demonstration. These people are emo.

A few metres away, in a room where three emo bands are playing, the crowd might look like they thought a little more about how to look scary, but that's about it. In my experience – IN GENERAL – the people are nicer, funnier, and less likely to take coke, start fights or cause drama, but just as likely to be able to drink their bodyweight. These people are 'Emo', and they scare the shit out of 'Lads' for looking a bit weird and for being altogether more well-balanced and comfortable with themselves (it takes a lot of balls to go out like that, for a start).

Going round town a couple of nights in a row with visiting Emo bands was a completely different experience to the one I'm used to – fun, friendly and posture-free. I can only presume that the cathartic nature of screaming about your troubles to music must leave the rest of the day free to indulge your sunny side.

Whereas many of the Lads I know, despite an almost aggressive insistance they're having a good time all the time, are in reality some of the most emotionally stunted people I've ever met, who don't seem particularly happy at all. A few too many pints and, like Michael Jackson's face, everything falls apart in an ugly way.

So, if you're of the less overtly masculine persuasion, next time a bunch of real Lads crash into your evening stamping, chanting and patting each other a little bit too hard on the back, just remember, they're more scared of you than you are of them.