Little Boots – Earthquake

• 25th Nov 2009

The blonder than blonde and blander than bland Mistress of the charts is back, serenading us in her tiny shoes like a Princess from Lord of the Rings dressed top to toe in Topshop.

After offering us a Remedy and succeeding in an illness, the overly electro ballad of Earthquake makes but a little crack in the ground. Following the very 2009 tradition of a sexy female voice cackling about a trivial interest in a boy etc, Little Boots has here made the song that best soundtracks how generic the countries pop scene has become.

At one point, Britain was desperate for a female pop voice, now, with so many queuing up, it has produced a culture of ordinary radio flirts. I conclude with the reflective. Insightful thoughts of Bill Hicks, who best sums up Little Boots and the like:

“When did mediocrity and banality become a good image for your children? I want my children to listen to people who fucking ROCKED! I don’t care if they died in puddles of their own vomit! I want someone who plays from his fucking HEART!”

There is no heart here, there is no hope here.